"Ten Bucks For My Immortal Soul? I'LL TAKE IT!"

Looks like a lot of VOD sites are seriously underpriced

JESUSLAND — In what's likely a toss-up between magnanimity and fear of lawsuits, Comcast Cable in Tucson, AZ is offering its viewers — the regular viewers, not the HD ones — a $10 credit on their next bills for those "impacted" by the porn interruption of their Super Bowl XLIII viewing on Sunday.

The 30-second clip from ClubJenna's Shorteez, then showing on the Playboy Channel but somehow shunted over to KVOA-TV's Super Bowl broadcast, came during the game's fourth quarter (as did an additional 10 seconds of end credits) just after the Arizona Cardinals took the lead, 23-20, with less than three minutes to go in the game — so everybody was paying attention — and what they saw was a full-frontal shot of Evan Stone, undoubtedly making grown men groan and women weep ... and a bunch of folks jump in their cars and head for late Sunday Mass.

"These 'accidents' seem to happen more often than they should, and if it truly was an accident, why is it always porn that's aired?" commented Tim Winter, president of the fundamentalist Parents Television Council , in a statement for the press. "TV station 'accidents' never include a rerun of the The Cosby Show .... if someone intentionally caused it, then that person or persons need to be properly dealt with."

Pulling out their fingernails with pliers okay, Tim?  Or do they need to be drawn and quartered ?

"We are appalled this highly inappropriate material was displayed for some Comcast customers," Gary Nielsen, president and general manager of KVOA Communications, said in a statement posted on KVOA's site.

Hmmm ... big, beefy men in football gear knocking the crap out of each other as they try to wrestle an inflated pigskin 100 or so yards down a field versus a fairly handsome guy — indeed, an ex-football player himself — walking around with his cock hanging out — yeah, BIG DIFFERENCE!

 "We can't undo what happened, but we remain deeply sorry for the impact this situation has had on our customers," Comcast Tucson corporate affairs manager Kelle Maslyn said in a statement Monday. "To that end, we will be issuing a $10 credit to any Comcast video customer in Tucson who was impacted. While this credit won't change what happened, we hope that it will demonstrate to our customers, and to the Tucson community, how seriously we are taking this situation."

Do you really, Kelle? Do you really take this situation "seriously"?  Do you have any idea how many children's immortal souls — particularly the girls' —could have been damaged by seeing 30 seconds of Evan Stone's johnson? Who's going to take the blame when, 10 years from now, those irreparably soiled children all grow up to be porn stars, probably working for ClubJenna, which, after all, is based right there in Arizona?

Ten bucks, indeed! That works out to just 33-1/3 cents per second! We hope you sleep well!


icon AVN NEWSLETTERS -- stay informed
AVN puts an honest, funny, and skeptical spin on the state of sexual pop culture, celebrity, and politics.
AVN Daily
Internet Weekly
Novelty Weekly
Gay Weekly
The Pulse - The Industry's Entertainment Tabloid