CHATSWORTH, Calif.—Everybody's saying it: The parodies are out of control. And while yes, they have been and continue to be a salvaging boon to the adult industry, they have also begun to make it stink a bit of desperation, what with producers scrambling to pounce on pretty much anything and everything that's not yet been pornified.
And some of the projects in the works seem ... well, not exquisitely suited to the XXX treatment, to put it gently. Let's be honest here: there most likely are not vast swaths of the population frothing at the mouth with carnal thoughts involving the characters of Curb Your Enthusiasm and The Golden Girls, two of the shows recently announced by Hustler Video and New Sensations, respectively, as the bases of forthcoming X-rated adaptations.
Then again, the curiosity factor that may inherently attend these seemingly not-ready-for-porn-time offerings—"What could possibly be hot about seeing a Larry David lookalike fuck?"—might move them off shelves as briskly as any other hit spoof ... more so, even. Who knows?
Still, shouldn't the fact that this is, above all else, still porn remain at the forefront of consideration? Should the main purpose of the product—to sexually arouse its viewer—not inform every aspect of it, especially its very premise? Or has that taken a backseat to simply being the first and/or best to present a pornographic take on __________?
Furthermore, as the well of source material inches closer and closer to dry, one has to reiterate the question so many around Porn Valley have been bandying about semi-jokingly the last few months: Where does it end?
Will there be any point at which porn parodies "jump the shark"? (To reference a show already twice parodied.) Have they already? Is any property—movie, TV show or otherwise—not potentially fair fodder to be turned fuck flick?
As porn has proven time and time again, its capacity for tastelessness knows no bounds. So we thought we'd throw out a few ideas for porn parodies that may seem ill conceived ... but if we know our porn, it just might consider them golden. Porn, the following are yours for the taking:
• Not The Birth of a Nation XXX
• This Ain't Fahrenheit 9/11
• Schindler's List: A Dark XXX Parody
• This Isn't What Happened on the Hindenburg XXX
• The Miracle Sex Worker
• Cast Away: The XXX Love Story of a Man and a Volleyball
• Dis Don't Be Precious XXX: Not Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire
• Cannibal Holocaust: The Porn Version
• Bone That Kitty!: The XXX Adventures of the BTK Killer
• Ass Times at Columbine High